HOSPITALITY                              

   A Disappeared Virtue in Today's Nigeria                               

                                               

Hospitality is one of the values in human life. It is the friendly, welcoming and generous reception and entertainment of guests or strangers. It is an act of kindness and love shown to people especially strangers. Hospitality takes the forms of assisting those in need as they approach one and finding people who are in need and then rendering some helps to them. As human beings cannot have it all most of the time, it follows that they will need the assistance of others. And the act of helping this people in this way is nothing but hospitality.

Though preached and practised in some other places, hospitality is so much associated with the African people such that it is one of the marks of African life. The African is known for his solidarity which he/she express to everyone even strangers. The African people receive strangers and take care of them to the best of their ability. The man or woman in African does not hesitate to help the stranger no matter the time. In some cases the stranger is allowed to spend the night with the host if it comes to such extent, just to make sure that the stranger is very comfortable.

Like the Good Samaritan in the bible, an African cannot see anybody in need and ignore the person. He/she must find possible means of helping anybody in need. Sometimes he/she takes full responsibility of the person in need as if the person is a relative or a close friend. The man or woman in Africa cannot remove his/her eyes from the sufferings/pleas of beggars; for he/she must in sympathy give out something to the needy. Hospitality is a valued way of life in Africa. That is why the description of the African culture will never be void of their Hospitality.

However, in some part of Africa, this value is greatly eroding away. Especially in our immediate Nigerian society, the culture of hospitality is dead; where it is alive, it is practised only by a very few people. In Nigeria today, one hardly finds hospitable people even among those who ordinarily should be by the virtue of their work. People hardly attend to strangers not to talk of helping them or even welcoming them in their places. The needy who come along people’s way are very often neglected. This has been the case in today’s Nigeria.

The very question to put forward at this point is the question of the “Why” of this situation. One of the causes of this sad situation is the Fear of the unknown and lack of trust for the stranger caused by past experiences. There have been many reports where the stranger after receiving helps from the people or person, harmed them. There are some stories which said that the stranger actually became an Armed Robber  as in the disguised form of a stranded stranger, he/she was able to know very much about the house  and in some cases as a spy invited his/her colleagues who then came and perpetuated evil on the hospitable family. In some other cases, the allegedly needy fellow upon receiving assistance from the person(s), turned against them. These things actually happened.

Consequent upon the above experiences, people no longer have the mind to listen to strangers; where they do so, they do not go beyond there, for fear of the unknown. People no longer trust each other. Even in cases where one appears to be actually in need, there is this doubt about the real nature of the person’s condition. Fear now grips everybody to the extent that one must fashion out a reason while he/she cannot be hospitable to the needy at any point in time. These and many other actions are the consequences of the fear people now have when it comes to being hospitable in relation to past experiences.

Besides the fear of the unknown caused by past experiences, western influence cannot be overlooked as a cause to the eroding hospitality in Nigeria and Africa at large. The white man hardly has room for his own relatives talk less of strangers. If a friend or a visitor must duly inform the anticipated host before coming, what about the stranger who never gave earlier information nor is known? Hence, some of our people who have stayed in these places and have imbibed the habit are never disposed to the value of hospitality. When strangers come to them for one thing or the other, they feel that they are being disturbed. For some of them just like their European counterparts, they feel that such assistance can only come from charity homes and organizations; and since they are not members of the charity organizations or charity homes, they shut their doors to the stranded strangers. These two reasons and others are causes of the disappearing value of hospitality in Nigeria and Africa.

The effects of this situation are much. One of them is that it made people enemies. When the stranger who was refused assistance gets better, he/she sees the people or person that denied him/her such helps as enemies and most often tries to revenge in one form or another. Another effect is that some of these stranded strangers end up receiving no assistance which worsened their situation. In some other cases, it has lead people to seek and get such needed assistance by all means available to them. These situations are results the disappeared hospitality in Nigeria and other places.

What ought to be done with the situation at hand is to imbibe the culture of hospitality; for the future may not actually be like the past. We all must be open to show kindness to people who are in dire need. We must give any stranger benefit of doubt and then attend to him or her. Even though there may be need to actually and thoroughly examine the stranded stranger or fellow, there is still room for some trust. This is because appearance may not be reality.

Nigerians and peoples of the world must learn and cultivate the habit of helping those in need irrespective of time or place or any other factor. We all are human beings and as such will not be sufficient for ourselves all the time. There can actually be cases where we may need the assistance of other people. If this then is the case, we ought to be open to people, confident that our intention will never be harmed in any way by the stranger receiving our helps.

But with the constant occurrence of those ugly experiences associated with hospitality, the courage to be hospitable will gradually die. Therefore, unless those ugly experiences stop, hospitality will build a house in oblivion in Nigeria and beyond!

 

Nwanyanwu Christopher